If You Had More Willpower, What Could You Accomplish?

By Debra E Viniar
[a 5–7-minute read]
 
After a tough day at work, all you want is to slip into your comfy clothes, watch an episode of your favorite Netflix series, and have a bowl of cereal for dinner—despite your good intentions to fit in 20 minutes of cardio and prepare a healthy meal. You also know that the kitchen needs cleaning, the laundry needs folding, and if you have kids, that list is even longer. As time goes on, the weight of your "to-do" list gets heavier, yet you struggle to find the motivation to get started.
 
Have you experienced this? More than once? Let's not forget the most frustrating part: waking up the next day feeling discouraged, knowing that once again, you ignored what you needed to do and instead did what you wanted. How can you build more willpower to achieve your goals and dreams?
 
At some point, most people face moments of weakness or struggle when trying to stick to their commitments. For example, eating that last piece of cake instead of sticking to a diet, skipping a workout to binge-watch a new series, or hitting the snooze button instead of waking up early. These choices often depend on a certain level of willpower. Many of us are aware of various strategies that can help in these situations, such as placing the clock across the room or wearing workout clothes to bed, among others. However, none of these methods seems completely reliable when you need them most. 
 
DEFINITION OF WILLPOWER
 
Willpower is essential for personal growth. It’s the ability to resist unwanted thoughts and impulses and make choices that support long-term goals, even when you don’t feel like it. Synonyms for willpower include self-discipline, self-control, tenacity, and determination.  Essentially, willpower helps us resist short-term desires to achieve our bigger ambitions. 
 
So, what could we achieve with more willpower? Take a moment to reflect on your own life. You may want to be healthier, quit smoking, get a promotion, save for an exciting experience, or take a trip to your favorite destination. The goals we set often mirror our deepest desires and the outcomes we hope to reach. However, having ambition alone, setting SMART goals, or using various strategies doesn’t always bring success. What are we missing?
 
Here's the good news: discoveries in neuroscience have changed our understanding of willpower. This shift is quite different from earlier beliefs. To understand this change, let’s first examine our current understanding of willpower.
 
TRADITIONAL WILLPOWER

Traditionally, willpower is viewed as a limited resource. You start each day with a fixed amount of willpower. This classical idea suggests that each act of self-control or discipline you undertake—whether it's resisting the donuts or cake in the back room or managing frustration—draws from the same limited supply of willpower. Just imagine you begin your day feeling fresh, with your health, work, and family goals at the forefront. By the end of the day, it seems you've not only fallen short of half your goals but also feel exhausted and unfulfilled.
 
This theory is known as ego depletion.  It suggests that using your willpower on one task reduces the amount available for subsequent tasks. This also explains why it's harder to resist temptation after a long, stressful day.  
 
When we find it difficult to resist our thoughts, feelings, and impulses, we often think that our willpower is depleted. This makes it harder to control basic urges, such as choosing a burger instead of a salad or ordering a second drink with dinner. In these moments, it can feel as though we have no strength left. Many people believe they need to wait until the next day to recharge and start fresh with a full tank of willpower.
 
Personally, I’ve never been a fan of waiting…I'm a born-and-raised New Yorker. 
 
WILLPOWER AND NEUROSCIENCE
 
The origins of willpower, tenacity, and self-determination, as viewed from a neuroscience perspective (based on numerous studies), stem from a specific part of the brain in the frontal lobe. The frontal lobe is located at the front and behind your forehead. (It’s a bit more complex than that, but this will suffice for the conversation.)
 
Within the frontal lobe is a specialized region called the anterior midcingulate cortex (aMCC); don’t worry, there will be no test. Studies show that the aMCC activates when people face challenging tasks that require resistance and effort. In other words, the aMCC becomes more active or stronger when you undertake a difficult action that demands effort. Additionally, the aMCC is highly adaptable, meaning it can change and develop in response to specific behaviors and experiences.
 
What does this all mean? It means that every time you do something "outside your comfort zone" or that you “don’t feel like doing," you strengthen the aMCC, which boosts your willpower and tenacity. Reduced activity in this area is linked to apathy and depression.  Now, this area doesn’t store willpower, so you’re either increasing willpower by taking challenging actions or decreasing your “willpower muscle” by being comfortable and playing it safe.
 
I find this excellent news. It puts the power in our hands. It shows us that willpower, self-control, and determination are not innate qualities; rather, they are skills we can develop and strengthen. I have three adult children, and I apply this knowledge accordingly. I wish I had known it when they were children. I believe this would've been useful for them.

If increasing willpower, determination, or tenacity is something that would make a difference for you, now what?
 
Here is the answer: take on “micro-challenges.” These are small tasks that are “out of your comfort zone.” The challenges must have an element of discomfort, something that you don’t want to do, or that requires effort, serving as a way to build perseverance and willpower. 
 
Let me share an example from my own life. I have consistently taken on the challenge of walking 10,000 steps a day.  This was a piece of cake when I was traveling for business. I would often easily exceed this goal.  Now, I work from home, which requires tremendous focus and effort to accomplish the same goal. I’ll frequently find myself at the end of the evening with 1000 or 2000 steps to finish, and the thoughts and feelings are always the same:

• “I don’t want to" and "you can't make me".
•  “No one knows that I have this goal, so who cares”?
•  “I don’t feel like it.”

Just imagine being in my shoes and add yours to the list. 

While I still have these same thoughts,  I get up and finish the goal.  The challenge is choosing willpower over my thoughts, feelings, and impulses. It’s not easy, but it pays off in the end.
 
Yes, I can always change the goal. Sometimes I do when I go away for the weekend. I keep this goal because 1) it aligns with my commitment, and 2) it acts as a micro-challenge that strengthens my willpower, which builds the foundation for growth in other areas.  Another micro-challenge I have is to finish my shower with a cold-water rinse. Let me tell you how tough that one is for me!
 
It’s critical to commit to something that requires you to overcome friction to engage in the behavior.  There are many activities that you can add that have a direct impact on the brain (brain exercises or brain training do not have the same effect). It is vital to maintain balance and avoid behaviors that could be psychologically or physically harmful.

• If you’re already exercising, consider taking up a new activity, such as yoga, playing an instrument, or learning a new language – choose something that challenges you both physically and mentally.
• Try ending your shower with a 3-minute or more cold-water rinse (or work your way up to it).
• If you’re doing cardio, add strength training 2x a week.
• You can start with 5 minutes of Meditation.

 
The studies mentioned earlier showed that rewarding oneself after successfully engaging in challenging activities can further reinforce the behavior and boost tenacity and willpower. A reward is always a benefit. Just don’t go overboard.
 
Other cognitive, emotional, and psychological resources can be utilized to support and strengthen willpower, such as getting enough deep sleep and maintaining a balanced diet. These are considered and addressed in our coaching sessions.
 
Next time, we will examine a revolutionary approach that neuroscience has developed to eliminate Imposter Syndrome.

As always, let me know if you have any questions:
​[email protected]
​